First Day of Summer School

I'm three days late, but that's because I can't seem to get caught up. This three kids thing is kicking my butt with our new schedule. The older boys started summer school at their new schools this week: Wesley in kindergarten at Adelante Spanish Immersion School and Thomas at Redwoods Internationale Montessori Preschool. The first day went great. They both said, "Bye Mom" and off they went. The second day, Wesley said "I'm scared" but he still went in with a little coercion. Today, was a nightmare. He went limp noodle on me in the playground, crying and saying he was scared, and he would NOT go in. Finally the teacher noticed I was having trouble and helped me literally drag him into class. I left in tears (with the TWO other kids in tow). When I came back he was fine and he told me about his day, and we had a long talk about it. I am really hoping tomorrow is better, but I am so scared. Scared of making a huge scene outside the classroom again. Scared of losing my temper because I don't understand my child. Scared they will tell me he is too young to start kindergarten and then his life will be ruined. Ah, the hysterical fears...and that is just with the eldest! Thank goodness Thomas has been enjoying his preschool, he even joined a Karate class today and "punched the square".
And so it begins...I suppose there is always something difficult to be working on, right? I keep hoping it will get a bit easier, or that my coping skills will improve. I love them so much, and I worry about them and want everything to go well for them...but I cannot control their situations. Here's hoping for a relatively smooth Thursday.

Back home

We just got back from our vacation last night and we are so fried. We'll get pictures up when we can, but there just seems to be so much going on. The boys both start new schools tomorrow and they are all out of whack from being out of their routine for so long. We had a wonderful trip and saw so many people. My mind is all jumbled up with memories and experiences from so many different eras in our lives that came back as I talked with people. And with three kids, it's rare that Jason and I get much of a long chunk of time to talk with each other about our thoughts. I get really chatty late at night sometimes. hehe

Friday night we left early to start our drive back to Cali with the U-Haul and the van. (We got some furniture from my parents' place) I decided to skip my 20 year class reunion--my own little way of "sticking it to the man"--for the sake of getting my family home in one piece. As I was driving with Thomas and Nathan sleeping (finally!) in the back of the van, my favorite song came on and I replayed it over and over because it just seemed to fit the mood. It makes me think of Jason and our week.

In the words of the Beatles (and the great Ozzy Osbourne)-

There are places I remember
All my life -  though some have changed
Some forever, not for better
Some have gone and some remain
All these places have their moments
With lovers and friends I still can recall
Some are dead and some are living
In my life I've loved them all

But of all these friends and lovers
there is no one compared with you
And these memories lose their meaning
When I think of love as something new
Though I know I'll never lose affection
For people and things that went before
I know I'll often stop and think about them
In my life I've loved you more

Though I know I'll never lose affection
For people and things that went before
I know I'll often stop and think about them
In my life I love you more
In my life I love you more 

I'm happy to be home with my husband and my sons. Our life may be crazy, and disorganized, and hurried, and messy, but it's our life, and it's the most fulfilling thing we could possibly do.